The Incomparable

527 B for Beholder

Our heroes move onward in a land of pixels and paintings as they wrestle with a split party, getting deep, real deep, into a book and a forest full of foes at fractious frame rates!

526 It’s Not Larceny, It’s Financial Planning

Things take a turn toward the 8-bit in a new saga for our adventurers, who are tasked with travelling inside a book to…do some murdering? Join them as they venture into a town where everyone answers to “NPC”, the aesthetic leans toward “blocky”, and everyone loves mead!

522 A Fluid Situation

The adventure concludes with friendly fire, double-grapples, and a whole lotta rules. Then we close the book on the whole thing.

521 Third Eye’s Blind

This episode’s highlights are wet stairs and a bad plan.

520 Sad Ghost Seduction

Classic TTRPG tropes covered in this episode: a player trying to seduce an NPC, players fixating on one random room, and players wanting to use their skills for intra-party nonsense instead of getting things done.

519 Turtle Dome

It’s so annoying when someone knocks on your door in the middle of the night.

518 Infinite Supply of Crab Juice

This episode has less chaos, but more dragon.

517 Never Bring a Dolphin to a Ghost Fight

The chaos continues with a greedy rogue, a breath-holding Tortle carrying a Gnome, a swimming Centaur carrying no one, a generous Tiefling, and a totally ineffective dolphin.

516 Tureen Full of Djinn

A chaotic crew assembles to free a head from a book.

502 Cultists Are Not Made of Robot

Time is ticking away, and our heroes don’t have much time to save Candlekeep from certain destruktion by … rocket ship tower? Will they make it?

501 Throwing Good Hit Points After Bad

More than a year later, our players (virtually) come together again to try to save Candlekeep Library!

500 Alpaca Macadamia Nuts

To celebrate our 500th episode, we bring you the only TPK recorded entirely in person! It’s an extra-long session recorded around a table, complete with the sounds of dice rolling, soda-pop cans opening, and chairs scraping the floor as people move around. The only way to feel more like you’re there is to watch the 360° version on a VR headset!

This episode kicks off another Candlekeep mystery in which N’iss, Naiasa, Valenthe, Merdri, and Quewaris investigate a trembling tower.

499 Math Is Fun When You’re Not a Werewolf

In this final episode of The Lore of Lurue, Lovyn wants to leave, Naiasa hides under a corpse, Hermioneigh is like a really great dance troupe, Frittat’ha gets back on the horse, and Lonewalker hesitates to touch the book. Tony is a generous dungeon master, and anyone who suggests otherwise is a bad person.

Oh, and listener secret_gaygent SAVES THE DAY.

498 Restore Bookness to the Book

In this episode, Lovyn scampers out of the rage zone, Frittat’ha is finally tanking, Lonewalker does a little deelybob, Naiasa has secret agent vibes, and Hermioneigh shoves a berry in someone’s mouth. Oh, and Tony doesn’t want to call the wargs by name.

497 Kreeeee! (Blood)

In this episode, Naiasa does some John Woo action film moves, Hermioneigh makes a carbon copy of herself, Lonewalker approaches the grick, Frittat’ha is careful not to set her friends on fire, and Lovyn wants to know if there are still cupcakes. Oh, and Tony makes bird noises.

496 A Disturbance in the Elk

In this episode, Lovyn gets his face ate; Naiasa makes poor life choices that are tactically unsound across a range of dimensions; Fritatt’ha bellows into a beak; Hermioneigh struggles to hit; and Lonewalker loses his elk. Oh, and Tony doesn’t know cupcakes.

495 Technicolor Owl

In this episode, Frittat’ha is still looking for her brother; Lonewalker chats with a tree; Hermioneigh doesn’t need a whole body’s worth of blood; Naiasa knocks on a suspicious door; and Lovyn looks down a suspicious well. Oh, and Tony doesn’t know trees.

494 A Heap of Drunken Satyrs

In the first episode of a new Candlekeep adventure, Naiasa is down to party; Hermioneigh whips it good; Lovyn does some stylish stabbing; Lonewalker tries to walk alone; and Frittath’a just wants to eat out of a tree stump. Oh, and Tony did not bring enough berzerkers.

479 Friendship Bracelets!

This episode wraps up Sarah of Yellowcrest Manor with these lessons: Once you reach the Big Bad, you should just set him on fire. A surprise round is one stab, one fire. And most importantly, rule number one of identity theft is “hide the body.”

478 Sleep Without Trace

This week’s lessons: After you break into a house, you look around. Night is the optimal time for evil. Small farming towns have no commercial district. And most importantly, murder is not a complete plan.

477 It’s Earthquake Weather

This week’s lessons: Geography is just map history. Murder holes are surprisingly expensive. If nobody’s heard of you, you’re not an A-list cult. And most importantly, the best kind of heist is when the players steal the campaign from the DM.

476 Never Turn Your Back on an Awning

The good news: Paulie invents “pants of holding,” and N’iss invents “napkidding” (reverse kidnapping). The bad news: due to a small earthquake and a large centaur, the horses are down.

475 CSI Waterdeep

The Candlekeep crew heads to Waterdeep to meet William Faerl, an elf with a helluva hat, and to play “Good Cop, Good Cop, Neutral Cop, Bad Cop, Bad Cop.” Or is it “Good Cop, Bad Cop, Horse Cop, Little Cop, Lizard Cop”? No, no, of course it’s “Good Cop, Bad Cop, Big Cop, Little Cop, Fake Ghost Cop”!

474 Open and Shut Case

Another Candlekeep mystery begins with—you guessed it—more book problems for Frittat’ha, Hermioneigh, Naiasa, N’iss, and Paulie.

447 A Showoff Assassin

In the final episode of The Price of Beauty, the adventurers take the battle to the hags…when they aren’t repeatedly pulling Townley from the abyss.

446 Murder Armoire

Our heroes are stuck in a hallway, and their only means of defense are arson and ice rinks with a dash of desperation.

445 Auburn or Blauburn

The party reunites, beats up some statues, and encounters language barriers in their quest to save a scared Dwarf from a questionable wellness clinic.

444 Marinara Mimosa

Jasper meets a kobold, Lonewalker befriends a gorgon, and they may unlock the secret of the spa…but at what cost?

443 Spataumatons

Relaxation turns into suspicion as the party learns more about a spa whose main product is secrecy.

442 Spa Day

Our heroes have a spa day, but behind the incense and wind chimes lies danger.

441 We’re Big Readers Here

A group of misfit adventurers climb through a book-shaped portal and into a suspiciously lovely spa on a quest to find a Dwarven librarian.

435 That’s Not a Boomstick

Our heroes reconvene, and the smackdown begins with spikes and teleporting and murderously rough terrain! Oh my!

434 Paulie Read an Ethics Book

The spelunking continues as our party confronts both menacing meenlocks and muddy morasses of morality.

433 Sorry about the Bagpipes

From empty(?) town to damp caves, our exhausted adventurers just can’t catch a break as they delve deep into the meenlock mystery.

432 Spooky Nightmares

Our (mostly) exhausted heroes explore the easily mispronounced town of Vermeillon to untangle the mystery of an abandoned domicile and the strange creatures within.

431 Disco Centipedes

Can our heroes resist an onslaught of disco centipedes in an otherwise drab town? Can they keep stay-stay-staying alive?

430 Bats are the Answer

In this new Candlekeep Mysteries adventure, A Deep and Creeping Darkness, a band of mismatched adventurers visit the realm’s largest library. Literary snobbery ensues.

426 A Troubling Amount of Blood

The party is so busy judging a book by its cover they forgot all about the bloody child. Shemshime’s Bedtime Rhyme concludes, and there’s even a bit of falling action!

425 Sharp and Pointy and Demanding

The earworm-based curse continues to sow discord among the adventurers. They’re sorry for all of this.

424 The Fighting Librarians

The party has gotten themselves into a classic cursed-book situation. But can they get out?

423 Upsetting Image

After four minutes of tag, Paulie is ready to use magic on children - all in the name of finding a solution to the curse of course…

422 Do Do Doo Doo Doo

A new Candlekeep adventure begins! Five familiar adventurers are stuck in the overflow rooms and concerned with toast.

414 Flying and Dying

The Book of the Raven finale! In which the party saves some of their people.

413 Dog Duty

The party goes one at a time into the grave.

412 Yelling Down a Well

Wereravens? There ravens!

411 Really Split the Party

The party encounters a muscular demon-goat thing.

410 A Weird Bird Pact

The party encounters a rolling cloud of darkness that murders things.

409 Cryptic Raven

A new Candlekeep Adventure begins! Another set of familiar and new adventurers encounter the Book of the Raven and wonder “Which way?”

408 Crowded Hovel

In which the party concludes the adventure by taking on some jacked-up jackals and making a rug burrito.

407 Library Police

In which the party plays “Good Book Inspector, Bad Book Inspector” with a pack of baddies.

406 Rat Management

In which the party can’t tell what’s blood and what’s tomato sauce.

405 Meatball Sub Vouchers

In which these book inspectors would like to speak to the manager about this Gingwatzim.

404 Almost Murdered by a Book

In which some familiar adventurers and a couple new faces encounter Mazfroth’s Mighty Digressions. And a generous amount of slime.

403 Approach the Toad

In which it’s time to quit horsing around and pony up.

402 A Horse-sized Hole

In which the party finds books in chains.

401 Lawful Good but Not Nice

In which the party learns a meatball sub is the best medicine.

400 A Walk with Paulie

In which five intrepid adventurers join DM Tony to discover The Joy of Extradimensional Spaces - the first adventure from the book Candlekeep Mysteries.