A new “Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens” trailer has appeared! And, as was fated, we are here to deconstruct it within an inch of its life. Dark Side IKEA end tables! John Boyega quotes us the odds! Bespoke evil ships! And is that a glimmer in your eye, or just some lens flare? Plus we give some love to BB8, everyone’s favorite robotic soccer ball.
Dan Moren reports in from the Star Wars celebration, and Serenity Caldwell phones in from her car. This is serious business, people.